Every morning last week I woke up around 7 am to get the kids up in preparation for the school year. I kept reading that it's a good idea to retrain your children for those early mornings. Michael caught on right away. Maggie was a little bit tougher. Me, I did all right. I like the rest of my day once I'm up early, but it's really hard to get out of bed knowing that Jamie will be there for another hour or so.
This morning is another story. It's almost 8 and I'm the only one up. I got up at 7 but decided that I just wanted to sit by myself. I made some hot chocolate, checked my grocery list, read some blogs, and read a little bit.
Michael starts school tomorrow. First grade. I'm excited about it. Both for him and for me. But, last night I started to worry. Stupid little stuff really. I just started rattling them off to Jamie. He listened :) I feel better this morning. Just a little bit nervous. So, I've chosen to pray about it.
I don't know why it's hard for me to pray for Michael and his first few days of school. I think I feel like I'm letting go of him a little bit more and I just don't feel quite ready to do so. If I pray, I will be letting go of what little control I have and allow God to be in total control. I know that God is sovereign and hears my worries and fears. He is my protector and he wants me to live a life that is free from worry. So, this morning I will place it all before him. Again later today. And again tonight. And again tomorrow morning. It will take me awhile to totally let go.
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6 comments:
I can't believe he's already that big... I still look at the baby pictures of him we have up on our wall...
I know this is coming from a woman who has yet to "be there, do that" - but your son will need his mom for a long time still. :) Even when he's not small - there are some comforts that will always come best from you and Jamie.
Lifting you up as you lift up Michael!! :)
You don't have to be a 'been there done that' kind of person to bless and encourage another sister. Thank you :)
Letting go is such sad words isn't it? It is a daily thing for me. I do love my control!
Watching your child go off into another persons care is one of the hardest things I have had to deal with. And having one child in someone else's care her entire life thus far is also a learning and growing experience for me.
Only 9 days though and then I hold my dear Ramiah! Much love to you as the school year is off and running.
ps what is your email again? If you have mine just drop me a line would you? Thanks.
Letting go is a continual process. I dont know when it ends. (yet) We homeschool, so our experiences have been a bit different than yours in this. (letting go none the less through the years).
Just recently my oldest got her first job. It really hit me how much letting go once again we were going through here again and would be in the next few years. I tried putting it into words to her...that we were letting go, slowly, but that she still had to grow some more wings. She looked at me and said with a straight face- "Im molting". I laughed so hard and she joined in. What a cut up. I have been so glad she has a great boss and good folks to work with. Even better, I know God is holding her 17 yr old hand as she goes through these growing up processes. Next year-college. ::faints:: I think surrendering our kids to God in this letting go happens again and again-almost daily.
Be encouraged-it can be hard-but God is always here.
The above comment and this one are from ME
Thanks guys. It actually makes me feel better just knowing that others go through it too.
Cindie, I can't seem to find your address. You can email me at JulieWetzel@MeridianChristian.org. It goes directly to my Juno account (which is a different address and will show different if I email you from there).
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